I went to bed the 23rd really missing my kitties. They took care of me when needed and said good-bye when I was strong and ready to say good-bye. Missed them so much I cried a little. Kyphie slept with my husband and Buddy slept with me. Kyphie left us first shortly after one of my miscarriages; hung around to heal me. Buddy left us a year and a month after my daughter was born. He helped me through my panic attacks; went to bed with me every night sleeping at my head resting his paw on my head to comfort me. I missed them the other night, their purring and prickly rough kisses. Missed feeling like I was being taken care of and watched over. While returning home from an evening walk through a Christmas lit neighborhood, my husband told me he swore he saw Kyphie on our stairs just sitting. I hadn't told my husband how I thought about them the night before. Even our pets can and do visit, they're here to still watch over. |
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Spent the day at the children's Museum in Seattle to celebrate my daughter's 2nd birthday. Just as we were leaving, Meema, my mother, noticed my daughter holding a stuffed animal. A snowy owl. Of course we had to buy it for her for two reasons. One, my daughter being so cute with it and two for the personal meaning.
The Snowy Owl. While in elementary school my brother either had to or chose the snowy owl to write a report about. I remember his frustration and procrastination over the assignment. His frustration from self doubt, feeling stupid wanting instead to just give up and take a failing grade. I nagged him to just do it and get it over with. I can vividly recall the way he would grip the pencil so tight in self aggravation. As firmly as he held to the pencil, he persevered. Even through his perceived short comings he completed the report. I wonder if from his research he learned the magical meaning of owls: wisdom. The sight of my daughter holding the snowy owl just filled my eyes with tears, the memory of my brother and this snowy owl report flooded my mind. Thanks for being with us today~ Yesterday I was out doing some shopping and on the return home I saw a dog running down a busy street. As I usually do I will say a quick prayer to St. Francis of Assisi to guide the dog to safety. Only this time I included my brother Ryan asking him if he'll watch over the dog too. Then thought could, "You, really watch over the dog?" Just as soon as the thought finished, I turned to my right and saw a suburban drive by with a rainbow sticker on it. Didn't think much of it until at the same time on the radio a commercial about a rainbow toy aired.
Those who know my brother would understand the rainbow connection. Thank you again for showing me you're listening, I love you~ |